Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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