Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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