Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize
