New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
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