dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Randomize
