how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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