Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
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