a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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