I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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