So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
it's great music for shaving your balls
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
