Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
