I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Randomize
