I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
