I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Randomize
