So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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