its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
