I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Randomize
