We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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