The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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