It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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