Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I skipped work to stalk him.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize