And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
North Korea, Best Korea!
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
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