Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Randomize
