some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Quick, to the slutcave!
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
