Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
