You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Randomize
