I got chris browned last night
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Randomize
