I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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