i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
