the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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