The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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