He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Randomize
