Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize