he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
this hospital has no fireball
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize