I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Randomize
