Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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