Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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