Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
