so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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