he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
the day after is always just damage control
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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