i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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