i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
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