Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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