People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I just threw up on my dentist
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Ketchup is God's man juice
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Randomize
