Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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