where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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