so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
