found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
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