I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
