i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Randomize
