So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Randomize
